writing

I have found a good way of dealing with myself when I am feeling not the greatest or falling into my old habits and triggers... writing. 
It is so therapeutic for me to write about my feelings or situation as if it's happening to a character in the third person. For example:

"Pieces of hair fell across her paper forming a pile of dark brown strands. Damn it! Stop! Alright, breathe. She put her hands on her thighs and rubbed her hands over her dark blue jeans, knee cap to hip, over and over, concentrating on the methodical action. You can’t afford to pull anymore. You’ll be happy you don’t. Please… breathe. Shakily she again picked up her pen..."

Hurp durp. I love writing. Have a good day!

with love,

Liz

break

Winter break...

Relaxing, reading and writing before starting it all up again for spring semester.

snow

The worst times usually have the best highlights. I was studying for an exam on a snowy day with Molly and Connor and then Connor surprised us with huge cookies :) Walking to class the other day people were hanging out free hot chocolate and playing Christmas music. So simple, so sweet, so awesome. 

poetry tips

It's finals week!!

 Although so much of our homework and school work in online now-a-days and most of us use computers, I am still a huge advocate of good ol pen and paper. For example, right now I'm writing about 10 poems simultaneously. No fun. Anyways, I have been getting alot of writer's block. To combat this I've taken to printing off whatever I have typed up and marking it up the old fashioned way then re-typing my revisions on the computer. A change of medium usually helps jog my sluggish mind.

Hope this helps any of you fellow writer's -block-havers :P

God bless & good luck!

With love,

Liz

Coffee and Nails

It's the little things. 
Yesterday one of my friends popped up at my dorm with a large coffee she had bought for me then gave me a hand massage and did my nails. 
What?! 
It literally made my day. Just little actions that prove that I crossed somebody's mind and they think I'm worth spending their time and efforts on absolutely rock my world and blow my mind, to be cliche.

sunny sunflower

"Learn from the way the wildflowers grow."

I still need to get it colored in but I am absolutely in love.

God bless :)

Murp&Fail

There is so so much strength in admitting weakness. 
{it's about to get real personal up in here!}
This morning was my first day back on campus after fall break so I should be pretty relaxed, right? Last night I had a huge spike of anxiety as soon as the car made the turn up the hill work, stress, books, people, drama, stubble bus, go team fail go! murp. Que some despairing comment from me and a sassy rebuttal about how I am so lucky to even go to college. How comforting. 
I have a destressing routine of power walking around campus with earbuds in, music blasted. I absolutely love it. So I stormed around for awhile, met up with Melissa, ate, and of course ran into a whole onslaught of stress-causing people. *eye twitch*
Back to the room and Molly and I share our thoughts on the stupidity of this and that Franny mentality (she went to DC and apparently the girls fall in to 'incapable-damsel-in-distress' mode when taken out of The Bubble) and then went to bed. Well, she went to bed. I cannot for the life of me fall asleep when I need to. So, awake I lay, trying not to lay on my fresh shoulder tattoo and lamenting the fact that I'm not already asleep.
7am rolls around. Molly wakes me up to go to a holy hour with her. I half awake mumble my excuses and fall back asleep. 8am comes and I shut off my alarm. I have an 9am and 10am on Mondays (along with a 12,1 and 4) and I skipped them both. As I laid there, I was over come with an irrational yet crushing inability to wake up and drag myself out of bed. I didn't want to be awake -- I wanted only to slip away to unconsciousness. I didn't want to deal with class, with the people I'd run in to from here to class or even Molly seeing my tattoo and lecturing me about how I'm failing at life. 

***

I 've admitted to myself that I need help. When I can't get myself out of bed, can't keep myself from pulling out my hair, picking at my skin and can't get myself to sit down with my huge pile of work without having a huge anxiety attack, I know something's wrong. 
I like to be self sufficient. I like to deal with myself by myself. But I can't. I will never learn the things I want to, do anything with my life, or even just be of help to others until I get myself at a stable place. 
Seeking out help is rarely in weakness. It's such a strength to admit your abilities and the need for somebody else's.

AUTMNAL

Friday before I left for home Melissa & I killed time behind my dorm.

I love me some denim shirts. 

hair!

The creativity of this post is astounding.

#Ilovefall

 I am incredibly behind on o so many things because all I want to is better my writing skills, drink coffee and listen to music. go, me, go.

:D

with love,

Liz

pitt&handmaids

Molly's intentship and a spur of the moment Pittsburgh trip made yesterday really pretty wonderful.
Rocco and I went to the Steubenville cemetery, most specifically the veterans' graves. Why? I don't know. Cemeteries are beautiful. Problem is that I started crying. {uugghhh} I hate people seeing me cry. But I just started thinking about my grandpa, and cry I did. 

Richard Knab :)
He was amazing. My grandma, too.

look at them :)

Anyway, so Rocco and I were driving back towards campus but when we reached the highway split for Steubenville or Pittsburgh, we took the Pittsburgh exit. As we drove we played music and I freaked out over the amazing sky. Pretty usual for us. Pretty awesome. 

Our aim was a coffee shop in Shady Side called Coffee Tree Roasters. It's a dual level coffee shop with lots of room, good music, brilliant atmosphere and -- of course -- great coffee and pastry. Before we went here, however, we stopped in the Pittsburgh cathedral and it was actually breath-taking. We walked (I love the sound of footsteps on echoing against stone walls), admired, prayed for a good 20mins and then made our way to the coffee shop and then headed back home to campus.

Once on campus I helped my lovely little roommate intent to Handmaids of the Lord household. She was so so happy and I immensely happy for her. 

with love,

Liz

scarves & Photo Booth

I love autumn -- muted colors, scarves, golden and firey leaves littering the ground. Perfection. I studied in the gazebo next to my dorm yesterday because it was so beautiful.

Today, the time has come -- it's scarf season! 

Comfy sweater, not too tight jeans, tan belt and Turkish scarf, that's how we do :P

I'm drinking Honey & Chamomile tea and working on my short story in dorm room with muted lighting. It is o so perfect.

have a wonderful day!

with love, 

Liz

Oceans of Ink

"Sure Lord, there is enough in Thee to dry/Oceans of ink;"

With a short story, writing exercises and part of a research paper due this week, I've been writing, writing, writing my butt off. It really is a love/hate relationship. Writing is o so hard but o so rewarding.

 I can write of Him through my story of alcoholics and pain. He always shines through.

I cannot wait to perfect my writing skills and glorify Him all the more. 

On a side note, autumnal weather is finally here and it feels o so fine!

with love,

Liz

Coffee Stains & Rings

Today started out brilliantly. I spilled coffee all over myself at breakfast. Mornings are my specialty. 

Omigosh, Becky... look at dat stain. 

New rings! I recently found an awesome little store on Etsy ( Birdy's Design Gallery ) This store sells high quality, inexpensive, unique, beautiful rings and other metal moldings. I would highly recommend them! 

Shout out to Melissa for forcing girly nail polish upon me :P

Now for some awkward hand/ring shots:

In other news my short story is finally coming along! I adore creative writing. I just pray that the work of my pen (or keyboard) is effective and beautiful for Him. Non nobis, Domine...

with love,

Liz

Sweet Afternoontimes

A routine has been forming of spending afternoons sitting around a table in the Trinity hall drinking pots of french press coffee, eating cookies, and talking with Rocco, Max, and other assorted wonderful people. 

Glory be to God for the little things.... :)

With love,

Liz

O teakettle!

Melissa likes to take creeper photos of me at breakfast :P

I am so thankful for autumnal days: falling leaves, crisp air, warm drinks, lovely layers and beautiful colors.

"October, baptize me with leaves! Swaddle me in corduroy and nurse me with split pea soup. October, tuck tiny candy bars in my pockets and carve my smile into a thousand pumpkins. O autumn! O teakettle! O grace!"

- Rainbow Rowell, Attachments 

with love,

Liz 

coffee

Happy National Coffee Day =)

with love,

Liz

(& Hailey!)

like mom

The last week or so I have been following in my mother's footsteps and living in the radio studio. Tuesday night radio show and practice for my broadcast class recording have kept me quite busy.

It's fun but o so challenging and intimidating. It's almost worth it just for artsy photos like that one ;)

with love,

Liz

recently

A cool breeze sweeps across campus, darkened leaves scatter the ground, hoodies and scarves are brought out from the depths of the closets in which they were hiding, and apple cider is back on the menu at the campus coffee shop; fall is in the air.

Life has been going well lately. My trip back home was so refreshing! No place in the world can replace the love I have for my city.

Anyway, I've been trying to write a fictional story for my creative writing class and my friend Joe told me it was sounding more like a philosophy paper. GAH. Failure is a skill I have mastered. DERP.

I just want to be home baking cookies, watching the Sunday Brown's game with my die-hard fans of relatives, and hit up my favorite coffee shop daily. Alas, one must suffer before he can enter the city of joy ;)

Ramble ramble.

have a wonderful day!
with love,
Liz

swirly skirt

I felt like dressing like a girl today.

 Herp durp.

 *twirl twirl*

 I ordered myself an awesome new ring from Etsy :)

 "and in the dust an dirt, o here/the lilies of his love appear."

That couplet has been stuck in my head today & just needed to share.

Have a wonderful day!

with love, 

Liz

Ingenuity Festival Cleveland

This weekend it was back to the homeland! O Cleveland, my Cleveland, how I had missed thee. It just so happened that this weekend was the Ingenuity festival and this became my first year to go willingly. My dad used to always drag me as a child to show me all of the awesome artsy things going on by locals -- especially Case staff.
I got home and received a text from a friend telling me that he was going and I should check it out too. So I went. As I drove, however, the rain began to fall harder and harder. Once I got over to Chester (a 35 mile per hour road) all of the cars were creeping between 25-30 and I was the peppy little red car out in front. It was going well, the rain made it pretty hard to see but I had driven this road thousands of times before. 
The the gas light came on. Ugh. I passed one gas station and missed it. Panic panic panic. The thought of being stranded in downtown in the pouring rain was not extremely pleasant to say the least. Luckily I came upon a BP, pulled in, darted through the pouring rain, paid 10 bucks on pump 5, darted back, and sat in the car soaking wet as the gas pumped. Whoo. 
So eventually I got the the Ingenuity festival which was held this year in the old warehouses by the lake. Numbers 30 and 32 to be exact. Artsyness at it's finest. The warehouses were filled with music from the bands playing, art hanging the walls, booths with cool technology things and crafts for sale, and my all time favorite coffee shop even had a booth set up. Heaven. As soon as I got in and we met up, I was immediately drawn to an exhibit set up with pews, stain glass windows and photographs of old churches. He said "Haha of course you go to this one first." #catholic nerd. We wandered for awhile and then -- once the rain had subsided -- went outside to buy a funnel cake and eat it next to the lake. It was so nice. 
O Cleveland, my Cleveland...always shall I love thee.

fro-yo

Simple, caring, human interactions -- what a joy to witness. A man from the fro-yo place down the street came into the coffee shop where I sat drinking and writing. He came with a big bowl of fro-yo decked out with all the toppings. 
"A customer wasn't paying attention and made something they didn't want. So we thought we'd bring it to you guys."
"Oh, man, thanks!"
"No problem. If you guys ever want anything, just give us a call and we'll bring it down."
"Thank you, man! I appreciate it."
This was followed by the barista digging into the creamy treat "This is just what I needed."

I love sitting here and observing customers interact with the men behind the counter -- joking, sharing, and having a brief second of human connection before picking up their drink and walking out into the brisk, autumn air. It's the little things. It really is. 

little & big

"There are only two things worth doing in this life: to know the truth and to be in love."

:)

It really is the little things: a nice outfit, lovely weather, good company...

... and the huge things like forgiveness & love.

He loves. He pursues and He fights for me. Lover of lovers, Champion, Conquerer, Sacred Heart of my Beloved Crucified, have mercy on me, a fool.

mmhmm

Sometimes it's just one of those days where you need to pour yourself a cup of tea, unwrap some chocolate, pop open the ol' iTunes, just chill out...

...and hold on till the weekend.

:]

With Love,

Liz

Selfies & Beartooth

I don't have an iPhone. I steal other people's iPhones. I take selfies. 

 I also wanted to show off my new shirt:

 It's for the band Beartooth. Go look them up now. Do it. Scratch that, I'll just link a video in this post.

"So this is my reward? A barely beating heart. But I still lie to myself I always lie to myself. My hands are in the air and God I hope you're there. Cuz I can't make it myself, I'll never make it myself." 

with Love,
Liz

long time no post

Well, long time no post...heh heh.
This week has been decently uneventful due to my fever made worse by my inability to properly hydrate thanks to a coffee addiction. **ssshhh, don't tell nobody!** I tried to study like a good student but -HAH- like that'll ever happen. I have a big ol rough draft, a Broadcast & Electronic Media exam, and Latin homework all due tomorrow. I, the ever productive, spent my time well by taking selfies. Go, me, go. 

Melissa and I have many an overlapping class after which we either sit across from each other, ear buds in, blogging or taking photos of the other for said blogs. 
It's finally getting cold outside (a fact unappreciated by me, the fever having one. I was burning all day) but I used it as an excuse to break out the long skirt and boots. whooooo!

 With love,
Liz

birthday weekend

Saturday:
There was a low Mass on campus that I went to (which was gorgeous) and then Joe invited me impromptu to his house with Joe and Rocco. So the rest of the day was spent relaxing at Joe's house with good conversation ending in an evening relaxing on his porch with wine for all and cigars for the guys enjoying each other's company after which we walked the property praying a rosary for peace in Syria. It is one of my favorite things to pray with friends -- it is such a bonding experience. By this point we were all pretty worn out and so we went to bed -- the boys in the living room and I in a real bed. Having chivalrous guy friends is the best :P
Sunday:
I woke up to Joe's adorable little kitten crawling all over me and finally falling asleep across my neck. I got up, saw the guys were still asleep, and went outside to get some homework done. After everybody had woken up and had a sufficient amount of coffee (4 cups in my case) we went to Mass. Afterwards we ran into Joe's old friend who invited us over to her coffee shop and gave up coffee and pastries. It was really nice because the shop was closed so it was just the four of us and her. The rest of the afternoon was spent studying, reading and playing some catch.
As soon as we were back on campus Joe, Joe and Rocco kept shouting from the car "It's Liz's birthday!!" Then I got back to my dorm where Becca and Melissa dragged me in, balloon and cake in hand, to see my decorated dorm room and my loverly roomie Molly =] (they also commented that I smelled like smoke and man.)

I'm so blessed to have people who are so so sweet to me.

with love,
Liz

Coffee, broken laptops & Pitt

Today was one of those days when stresses lead to joys and I look back on myself and amusedly shake my head for having been so worried.
My laptop wasn't working and I was told that the hard-drive was broken, I would need to go to the Apple store to get it fixed and I would probably lose all of my data. [ugh] Que stress attack. Luckily that night some of my friends were planning to go out to the Pittsburgh area for dinner so I asked Rocco if he would drive me out ahead of time to get my computer checked out by the Genius Bar cool kids at Apple. He agreed and we left for a 6pm appointment (...we arrived at 6:30pm) He could obviously tell I was highly stressed about this whole situation so he rolled downed the windows, told me I could plug in my iPod and blasted music for the whole of the 45 min drive. I couldn't help but relax into the seat, smile, close my eyes and sing along. Glorious. 
Once we got into the Pittsburgh area I was shocked at what I found. Being a die-hard Clevelander I had a bad mental image of Pittsburgh but once we got into the college town area, I fell in love (almost forgetting it was Steelers' territory) Streets lined with tiny shops and stores surrounded by brick apartments is definitely my kind of setting. As Rocco and I walked from the car to the Apple store we passed a coffee shop and a book store, making a mental note that we needed to stop there on the way back. 
Long story short, my computer was fixed. They did, however, need some time to fix it which gave Rocco and I a good opportunity to check out the above mentioned coffee shop and bookstore. Rocco must have been highly amused because when I walked into this little store I transformed into a little kid in a candy shop: books, tea, mugs, literary t-shirts, cards, stationary, calendars and useless adorable knick-knacks lined the walls and shelves. It was perfect. To top it all off Rocco bought me a mug as a birthday present. Goodness.
We next walked to the coffee shop and ordered one medium coffee, one medium iced coffee and two cinnamon almond chocolate dipped biscotti, sat down in a corner, drank, talked and ate. It was my idea way to pass the time with a friend. So much good.
We then picked up my laptop and drove to the restaurant, Burgatory, and met up with our friends there. After getting back to campus we decided to drive down to the river bank where Rocco, Joe, John, Kiran and I sat, talked, threw rocks, and just enjoyed eachother's company for a good almost 2 hours. Back to campus we then went where the guys smoked and talked for another good 2 hours and I had yet another good conversation with Joe. 
It's the little things: espresso, conversation, sunsets, books, coffee, Genius-Bar-geniuses, music and car rides. I am so very grateful for the amazing people I've been given in my life and all of the incredible conversations had with them. God is so good.